Fat Shaming and Medicine
As a tribute to #FlashbackFriday, I wanted to write a different type of post and share a story of mine that has definitely contributed to why I decided to go a more nontraditional route.
So, here I was turning 20 years old and I weighed 420.7 lbs according to the beer keg scale I had to use because 350 lbs. is the average max capacity of scales used in your home. Initially, I was depressed and felt that I had to seek a different route for what I was going to do with my life. However, I couldn't accept giving up on my dreams for myself so my goal was to become a better candidate overall. I wanted to prove to myself that I had not overcome so much in life already to give up. That upcoming summer, I spent anywhere from 2 to 4 hours a day hiking at Eisenhower park and eating next to nothing. This method was definitely not a healthy way to loose weight. It sincerely took nearly a decade for me to figure out that the key was a combination of portion control and healthy food choices, and the mental wellbeing to honestly analyze my relationship with food...but this post isn't about the how to loose weight (look into the MyFitnessPal app for some tips if you're trying to start loosing weight).
I lost 100 lbs. that summer and I was determined to keep loosing weight. My girlfriend at the time, who I liked so much that I put a ring on it, never made me feel as though my weight was holding me back or that I wasn't as capable as I felt inside. Looking back, her support got me through many things and I'll love her forever for loving me regardless of my weight. But I digress...
So, over the next three years, I dedicated myself to loosing weight and I lost 250 lbs. putting me at 170 lbs. I reached the end of my bachelors degree and walked the stage the day we brought my first son home from the hospital. I was now at a crossroads as I had these expectations for what parenting should be and how a "real man" is supposed to provide for his family. As a new and freaked out parent I thought it was better to continue getting my masters and make additional plans to pursue other career options since I now had this doubt that I was not medical school material and I had to quickly become a stable provider for the home. My wife always tried to tell me otherwise, because pursuing my passion was more important in her opinion than being the main provider, but I can be stubborn and hindsight is 20/20.
By this point, I was already considered a nontraditional student based on having a child and being older than most students entering medical school. In retrospect, I blew the age thing out of proportion (based on what I reading on student forums); I was only a year older than most entering students at the time. I felt obligated toward providing for a family and did not think medical school would fit in with that idea. So, I entered a masters program at UTSA so that I was still progressing my education so I could reach this dream of a better quality of life, and most importantly at the time, deferring these horrible student loans.
I finished the Master's degree in May 2014 and decided this was the time to apply because I felt confident with my body, mind, and family support for strength. I was going to apply to Texas schools through the TMDSAS system so that I could keep my family in Texas and we would be able to rely on extended family for backup support. I received and completed secondaries from most Texas schools, but did not get any interviews nor selected for a seat. I was disheartened to an extent, but I also had been doing social work by that point for child protective services and was getting a lot of enjoyment from the job. Turns out it wasn't meant to be at the time as we ended up welcoming our second child by the following year.
So with more background, the "Why Ross" section of a previous blog post probably makes more sense.
Medically speaking, anyone with a BMI over 30 is considered obese. I am considered obese (apparently dads gain weight in pregnancy too). In a very sincere way without any arrogance intended, I do feel qualified to advise people on their health and help them reach their goals in medical treatment. I have yet to be judged as incapable when I offer a patient medical insight, and some patients give me more credit than I feel I deserve at this point in my medical education. One thing I have come to realize is that patient education and treatment motivation is not based purely on medical knowledge, but is intertwined with the medical professional's ability to connect with the patient in a meaningful and compassionate way. Thus, I value my time with each and every patient because I care about his or her wellbeing. I feel that I invest in the patients and their successes feel like my own, just as I feel their pain with setbacks. One thing I admire about my school is that they provide most applicants a chance regardless of their academic background. If you look on forums online or ask some people their opinion of offshore medical schools, you will hear many opinions like "it's a con and a money making scheme for the schools" to "that's where the one's who aren't smart enough go." However, my experience has been that this is where you go to prove yourself. I personally have done well on this journey, and I have a couple friends who have shown me their STEP 1 scores above 250. I also know people who didn't survive basic science years and will likely struggle with the student loan debt accrued. Ross specifically has many resources, and does provide the opportunity for you to succeed if you bring the strong work ethic and the drive to be the best that is required to thrive. I have had optimism from this process, and looking back I probably have Valerie to thank. My initial interview with Ross was such a positive experience, and I genuinely felt welcomed and like the type of student who would succeed. During that interview, I was affirmed that my family was an asset to me, as I strongly believed. That if I brought the ability, then RUSM could provide the opportunity to earn an M.D. and be able to practice in the U.S.. Actually, it might be an interesting research project to analyze student interviews, follow the student longitudinally, and review the outcome because I'm a believer that a great first impression can set the tone for what is to follow.
So, what is the point of sharing my story with you? I don't want you to be sorry or to be impressed; I want to impress upon you the importance of not underestimating someone's potential, including your own. In America, a country I have always believed to be great, you really can be whatever you want to be if you have the drive to succeed and a series of half-chance choices that help move you in the right direction. Surround yourself with good people who motivate, inspire, support, and uplift you and do not tolerate people who are reckless with your emotions, resources, or time. Learn from every mistake and use that as an opportunity to grow because the moment you choose complacency is the moment you deprive yourself of reaching a higher potential. Never forget what is important to you or give up on yourself because we are all capable of doing and achieving really amazing things.
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If you have any questions, or would like to see a specific topic addressed then please reach out to me! I thank you for reading my story and I hope it's shown you some insight into my perspective on life.